A 24-yr. old single Indian male writes:

I am 24 year old guy living in United States. I started masturbating when I was 14 years old. I used to masturbate 3-4 times a day. I never had any problems for about 2 years. In fact I scored one of the highest scores in our school in my tenth standard. During 11th standard I heard about Raj Bapna Mind Power. I bought the cassettes that are supposed to contain subliminal messages that enhance your mind power. Anyway my problems may not be directly connected with them. I am not sure about it. After a few weeks I felt that I should not masturbate and I will lose my memory if I masturbate too much. Then I noticed "floaters" in my eyes. I started having jerks in my neck like my head will shake whenever I tried to concentrate.

I believed everything happened because of masturbation. The conscious drove me mad. You will not believe how difficult it is too live with psychological guilt. Sorry to be rude. But to me death would have been a blessing at that time. Then college came and I still had the same the problem. But it became so complex like I am becoming violent.

My biggest problem was that I will not be able to concentrate on my studies as I will see "floaters" and jerky feelings of my head. I am the only child to my parents. I used to get violent mad and becuase of my high stree i got vitiligo .I do not have discoloration all over my skin. But only in a few spots (like 1 cm) in my limbs and hands!!!..I would have committed suicide but the only thought that holds me back is my parents. My parents have enormous debts and they solidly depend upon me to solve them. But my parents do not know anything about these things. Seeing the violent attitude of me, they sent me to a psychiatrist. He told me that everything was my imagination.

Every problem I faced was created subconsciously by my mind becuase of the masturbation guilt. He also told me that I can masturbate as many times as possible and nothing wrong will happen to me or to my nervous system. Later I finished my Bachelors but still I was not convinced.

Due to my parents compulsion I came to America. I am in further more pressure because my parents have spent all their money on me. They still do not completely comprehend my problem.. They think that their son ,a normal and healthy guy, will succeed if he gets support financially. If I have not masturbated (or if i have not suffer from those problems), I would have got at least a job and I would have been happy by now. Can you please help me ?. All these years I barely finished my degrees and I am trying to get a job in US to pay back all the debts.

Please do suggest me some books that can enlighten me about masturbation and the effects psychologically. Please tell me if I have to take any medicine I am more than willing to take. I also found a link that states exactly opposite to modern medicine's theory of masturbation. Please go through that too. Please give your opinion on that too. http://www.kuruvinda.com/health.php?c=10

Thank you for sharing your concern with sexualcounselling.com

I will try my best to answer your questions.

Before 1960s, people who wrote books on sex stated with an almost religious fervor that masturbation was a very bad and harmful thing to do. Tissot, a physician wrote so convincingly that those days the entire medical profession believed that Masturbation is harmful. Every thing from impotence to insanity to varicocele were attributed to matsurbation.

As sex research has taken a new dimension in the sixties, the scientific outlook towards masturbation started changing as was the case with a number of other medical conditions and ordinary physical traits as well as habits. Today almost the entire medical researchers are convinced that masturbation is harmless. There are no known clinical conditions that result from masturbation. Contrary to being believed as a harmful practice, masturbation today, is recognized as a tool / technique that can help solve a number of problems.

From collection of semen sample for laboratory examination.. to teaching how to reach orgasm .. to training overcoming premature ejaculation.. to compensating orgasmic problem of a partner.. masturbation plays an important role in sexual life. Monkeys do it, Giraffes do it, camels do it, the cattle do it, birds do it.. both in captivity and nature (You may have watch noticed it in TV Channels such as Discovery).

Those who have suffered out of masturbation were only those who were terribly guilty of the act. And those who were addicted to masturbation and did it compulsively in spite of not having need to do so. Guilt, Addiction, Compulsion, Obsession these are culprits in anyway in every sphere of life, in the sense they affect the normal thinking and normal functioning. If we could get rid of them, we also get rid of the perceived evil effects of masturbation.

I have read the article in kuruvinda.com. The argument is impressive but I suspect if it would stand test. I personally do not believe in any such theories, since unbiased research has shown that masturbation is harmless. Besides my own logic tells me my belief to be right. If I were you and of the belief that masturbation is harmful,  I would simply quit masturbation and be relieved with that. If I realize or believe smoking is harmful, would I not try to quit smoking and thank myself for that?

What about the effects that already occurred? Be assured that no harmful effects ever occur with masturbation. Even if you are not willing to accept this statement, you may at least believe that any such effects will be reversed on their own soon after you quit masturbation.

Floaters in the eyes? Every one has them. They are tiny spots and thread-like dust particles trapped in the film of water covering the eyeball. These floaters appear to float in front of your eyes and move up or down or sideways as you move your eyes ... and then slowly fall down until you lift your eyes up again. They are conspicuously visible when you stare into distant objects, gaze listlessly or watch objects too closely. The only problem is becoming conscious of them and attributing it to behaviours like masturbation.

So is the case with vitiligo. I do not see in what way it is connected to masturbation. Vitiligo is a pigmentation disorder that has some genetic basis. If we are destined (by genes) to get it we get it anyway whether or not we masturbate. Vitiligo has no satisfactory cure. All the same do not ignore it and visit a dermatologist to see how he can help you arrest further growth of vitiligo.

I concur with your parents' impression that you are a fully normal and healthy person. Why not?

All of us do suffer from some weak points. Recognizing, downplaying and  overcoming the WEAKNESSES ... and recognizing, enhancing and  operating upon  our STRENGTHS is THE KEY to success. Your weakness appears to be that you are stuck with masturbation guilt. Get rid of it and you are a roaring success.

By 'getting rid of it' I mean that you do not let it bother you any more. Tell yourself that masturbation is a normal part of healthy sexual development and you are doing what every body else is doing. If you are uncomfortable with that idea, stop masturbating and there you are ..  a happy and healthy guy. Regain your confidence and seek out a job that best suits to your qualifications. Going to US is not an easy thing. Not everybody can achieve it. YOU DID it, which in itself is a proof that you are competent in many areas. Certainly you will be absorbed in a job. Take up the job not just to clear your debts, do the job towards your soul's contentment. Do it with sincerity and dedication, for you also owe to serve the community which has given u the opportunity for higher ed. Money will anyway come your way. Sorry if I sound preaching.

All the best.


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